Wednesday, October 06, 2004

Over Reaction Day explained

PMS is rumoured to affect only 90% of women during their childbearing years. Personally, I actually don't know one woman who still has a uterus that doesn't enjoy PMS in some fashion. Most women experience symptoms with such severity that it interferes in one way or another with daily living activities. Or the daily living activities of our significant others, family members, pets, the mailman, drivers on the road, the clerk at the store, or any other poor unsuspecting bastard that dares to get in our way.

My monthly bout of estrogen dominance has sparked for me a "holiday," if you will, which I lovingingly refer to as "Over Reaction Day." Sometimes there are warning signs the night before, but usually Over Reaction Day arrives wreaking unexplained havoc on my successful, normally well adjusted, medication free, perfect, happy, responsible adult life. It's true. I fall asleep snuggling in the strong arms of the man who loves me, after a great evening, secure, happy and peaceful, dreaming of all the good times ahead of me, ahead for us.

And then I wake up.

I know right away what day it is. The fact that everything is WRONG from the moment I open my eyes is my first clue. It is like some great vengenance has been visited upon my cherished life and caused me to be annoyed and bothered by absolutely EVERYTHING, without cause or discretion. Usually I make some attempt to get up out of bed and tackle the world, even though somewhere underneath all my sudden irrationality I suspect it might bring world peace if I (and others like me) stayed in bed just this one day.

Yesterday, Duncan looked lovingly at me in the bed and asked if I would come to have coffee with him. He had no idea what demonic evils were brewing inside of me, yet, responding to his sweetness I said yes. Anyways, maybe I was wrong about what day it was. I mean, so far I had yet to shred the ankles of the nearest living being...

I made it ok to the coffee shop. But then it happened.

"I'd like a large medium roast coffee, please."

How dare he! He'd like "a" cup of coffee? How dare he insinuate that he is alone at the coffee shop, and not with me, the goddess of all things wonderful? And how could he NOT order ME a cup of coffee? ESPECIALLY after I so graciously ignored his dirty underwear on the bathroom floor that very morning?

Sensing a disturbance in the force, Duncan quickly ordered a coffee for me as well. But it was too late. Ofcourse it was.

So what do I do? I over reacted, ofcourse. After finishing my coffee I went straight to the mall and had my hair coloured.

Blonde.

And thats how I celebrated (survived?) this months Over Reaction Day.